I started my college process like every other student: with the SATs. However, unlike most students, I had spent the proceeding 4 months reviewing sentence structure, math concepts and reading techniques. I took practice sections almost every week; I would shut my door and inform the entire house that no one was to disturb me while I prepared for my future. Now, that seriousness makes me laugh, but between the regular SATs and then the subject test, it was my life for almost a year.
Now I’m sure most of you are thinking, “she’s crazy.” Go ahead, admit it. I feel the same way sometimes. I push myself way to hard and worry about things that while important, aren’t that important.
I remember working on my Georgetown application and staring at my computer for almost 5 minutes before actually submitting it. Again, I needed to recheck everything, ensuring that it was perfect. It was my first choice and I knew I’d be devastated if I wasn’t accepted. The month and a half wait to hear the committee’s decision almost killed me. You can ask my friends; I talked about it constantly. “You’ll get in, Taylor. Stop freaking out.” “But what if..” was the chorus on replay in my head.
On the Monday before I was supposed to find out, I was called to Ms. Hirshfield’s. I didn’t know what it was about, but I figured a college had sent me a package, which wasn’t uncommon. I walk in and she’s beaming. I give her the awkward, “I don’t know what’s going on, but it must be good” eyebrow raise.
“So… Georgetown,” she prompted.
“I don’t hear till Wednesday,” I answered.
She was still grinning and then it hit me.
“I got in! I got in!” All of a sudden I was jumping and clapping. No, it was not one of my most modest moments, but I didn’t care. I was too happy for words.
I called my mom, who shared my excitement. “I knew you would, honey.” My dad was even more blunt over the news. “Yeah.. and? It’s not like I didn’t expect it.” Each one of my friends echoed their sentiments. “Of course you did, congrats!” “We knew you would, Taylor.”
The more people I told, the more annoyed I got. Was the accomplishment less impressive because it was expected? Even worse, if everyone else had knew, why hadn’t I? I couldn’t help but wonder, If I had known that everything would work out in the end, would I have let stress dictate my entire high school career?
Tia entered the stadium anxious and with hope—hope that she would not give a less than extraordinary performance. The random lineup for the performance invaded her mind as she tracked, “One down, four to go…two down, three to go.” Tia thought, “I hope I’m not called next” after two people had performed and she had not yet been called. Her intention was to wait as long as possible to take the stage. In the meantime, Tia fought tremble and dizziness. Then suddenly her name was called. Her heart skipped three beats as she fought her first instinct to avoid the performance. Tia walked up to the stage, took a few deep breaths (which only help to a certain extent, never fully ridding one of pre-performance jitters), and began her performance. She ultimately belted out and the crowd responded pleasantly. Tia discovered that she, if nothing else, grasped her courage.
Clearly rules don't apply
Can't believe that I just met you
You got me here, watching minutes passing by
Wondering when to expect you.