The Little Girl With Indonesian Snacks

After reading Trevor Noah’s biography “Born A Crime '', I got inspired to write about my own childhood experiences indulged in Indonesian culture. The culture that was actively present in my life while I was growing up and made me the person I am today. In this story, you can see how I always knew and always identified as an Indonesian American, ever since I was a child. My parents never really had to force this culture on me, I fully embraced it the moment I stepped out of my mothers womb. When I found out I’m more Chinese than Indonesian, it was a total shocker to me. I was super stuck on being only Indonesian, I started to rethink my identity. What I learned about myself from this realization was that where I felt like I belonged was who I was. Just like Trevor Noah, he felt pulled from both sides of his racial identity and didn’t really know who he was, but on page 46, he states, “I saw myself as the people around me, and the people around me are black.” I grew up with Indonesian culture, the people around me were the culture. The church I went to, the people I talked to, they all spoke Indonesian, therefore I decided that I shouldn’t feel guilty for choosing Indonesian culture and fully embraced my decision. Trevor Noah described himself as a chameleon, he used languages to blend in. Language was a big thing on my mind when I found out that I was more Chinese than Indonesian. I realized I couldn’t accept the fact that I was more Chinese than Indonesian because I was too scared to. Indonesian culture was my safe place, it’s how I grew up. It was something familiar to me. I could speak Indonesian, not Chinese. What I learned about myself from this realization was that where I felt like I belonged was who I was. I grew up with this culture, I loved this culture, and it will always be who I am. Something that I realized as I started to embrace the Chinese part of me, was that I actually had more Chinese culture in my daily life than I thought. I learned that some of my favorite foods my grandma cooked that I thought were Indonesian food were actually Chinese food, and that the home remedies my mom would give me when I was sick were ancient Chinese remedies. I am proud of myself for opening up to this culture over many years, but I know that deep inside, I will always be the little girl with Indonesian snacks.