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Eamon - 2fer Revision

“The moment we saw each other, we knew it was meant to be.” Almost everybody has heard this phrase on TV or in the movies, but does this happen in real life? Because of this small sentence, lots of people ask how someone could fall in love with someone just by looking at them. Many people assume that people can choose who they fall in love with. However, brains are actually controlled because of the powerful force love has, so they can’t force themselves to love someone – it just happens.  

Looking at the science of it, there are many small components that make someone fall in love with their significant other. For instance, their face. An Australian scientist discovered that women prefer a man with a symmetrical face, which is often considered a sign of good health. In an interview, Dr. Grossman, a physiologist, said, “It’s a survival of the fittest thing. We subconsciously look at their face and say, ‘That’s a great face -- our kids are going to look awesome.” It is a form of judgment, which is a quick one. It takes even less than a second for their brains to make the decision when they first meet someone. This has turned into people calling it “love at first sight.” People, when they meet someone of the opposite sex, tend to visually fixate on the face to see if they will see any signs of any romantic love.

This basic concept of love at first sight has been used in many stories, such as Romeo and Juliet, and West Side Story. However, one of the most popular TV shows, The Big Bang Theory, began with this simple experience: In the pilot episode, two physicists return home from work when they notice a woman moving in across the hall from their apartment. The moment one of the physicists, Leonard Hofstadter, makes eye contact with the woman, Penny, he instantly becomes nervous and begins stuttering when he speaks. At the end of their conversation, he turns to his colleague and says, “Our babies will be smart and beautiful.” Love at first sight is always looked at in a curious manner by most teenagers and adults. They used this concept in the show to send the message. This is a general example of how it only takes within five seconds for someone’s brain to analyse the person they’re meeting and make a decision on whether or not they like them. It is like saying they only get one chance to make a good first impression of themselves.

But love at first sight is not the only example of how we could suddenly end up loving someone. People are most likely to fall in love with people they hang out with every day: Their friends. They can choose their friends, but they can’t choose which of them they are in love with. The love force always starts small, and then it slowly gets bigger, making it more clear to the person as time progresses. It usually takes a few months, but at some point, someone will begin to think of their friend (opposite sex) more often than they’re used to. Specifically, there is such a thing as two lovers with completely different personalities. A professor of physiology said that, "Based on what research evidence shows, similar people are more likely to get together in the first place -- and are also more likely to find satisfaction in their relationship." (Prof. William Ickes) It may be most likely that mismatched couples may not stay together for long, but it is how they loved each other in the first place that makes people curious. It’s like needing a positive charge and a negative charge to make a battery or needing peanut butter and also jelly to make a sandwich. Opposite people who fall in love have brains that somehow attract to each other. It is one of the ways that show how love can happen at any moment, without people knowing.

If people stopped to think about it, they would realize that love is not just about "love at first sight," but also opposites attracting as well. People assume that love is as simple as meeting someone, and then developing an affection towards them. Actually, the powerful force of love is running through their systems every day without them knowing.

Works Cited:

Scott, Jennifer A. "8 Secrets (From Science) For Falling In Love." The Huffington Post. N.p., 2014. Web. 21 Sept. 2014. <>.

DiLonardo, Mary Jo, and This Article Was Originally Published on "Do Opposites Really Attract?" CNN. Cable News Network, 01 Jan. 1970. Web. 21 Sept. 2014. <>.


The Fashion Industry

“Degrading, disgusting, and demeaning: I'm ashamed of modern women's magazines”, “Teen fashion model Georgina got so thin her organs were failing. But fashion designers still queued up to book her.” Lots of people gag in disgust when hearing news about the fashion industry. Many people think that the industry is only for skinny, rich people who think that beauty is defined by a thin body and long flowing hair. However, is is much more than it seems. Though the fashion industry may be seen in a negative light, it is actually sending many good messages to young women around the world. In the real world, the fashion industry provides freedom and inspiration for young women, and allows them to feel confident about themselves.

One of the biggest misconceptions that people have about the fashion industry is that  everyone is unhealthy and stick thin. In fact, modeling trends change every season and the trend of unhealthy, stick thin models is over. The trend of healthy, “normal” looking models is in and seems to be staying. Though it may have been true before, the industry is moving past scary standards and is starting to promote health to it's models and young women everywhere. In an article from The New York Times, the author talks about being inspired at Madrid Fashion week after hearing news about its models. She says “It has been a lot of fun – and educational and, actually, inspiring – to watch the fallout from Madrid’s decision to ban hyper-skinny models from its formerly much-overlooked Fashion Week.” People around the world are starting to take action and seeing how what they present affects other people. They have realized that women should be seen as beautiful and healthy not sickly and stick thin. The law in Madrid was a big inspiring step to women and the fashion industry because it shows that every woman is beautiful and you don’t have to conform to old beauty standards to be special. The law is bringing out a big body positive vibe in many people.

An even bigger step to promote health and acceptance of all body types was recently in 2014. Many young girls believe that they can not fulfil their dreams of being part of the fashion industry because of their “bigger” size. This year a new trend has arisen, Full Figured Fashion week. The author shares her great experience at the show saying “The guests are more racially diverse—there were plenty of white people, but much of the crowd was African-American and Latino—and they come in every shape and size: short women with slim waists and enormous breasts, tall women with narrow shoulders and thick torsos, round women, pear-shaped women, and a few mesmerized men. The atmosphere is celebratory, rather than cutthroat.” This event really shows that anyone can be accepted in the fashion industry. You don't have to be six feet tall and weigh 115 pounds to fit in. People can be who they want to be and still make it big time in the fashion industry. This kind of event can inspire so many people, especially young girls, to do what they love no matter what they look like.

Many women want to feel empowered and feel good about themselves by doing something like starting their own business. In 2002, 57.4% of all businesses were owned by men, making it truly, a mans world. One big inspiration to women in the business world is a fashion designer named Tory Burch, who started a foundation to help women start their own small businesses. The foundation provides many benefits for women, “Through the Tory Burch Foundation Fund, Accion provides microloans ranging from $500 to $50,000 while the Tory Burch Foundation provides mentoring and entrepreneurial education opportunities.” The Tory Burch foundation is one of many foundations to promote women and business in the fashion industry; others include the Fashion Empowering Women foundation and mentoring from people such as Rachel Ray. When the women get this opportunity they are being believed in and being told they can put what they sat their minds to and this is a great push. This shows that the fashion industry wants to inspire and help women pursue their dreams.

Many people think that the fashion industry is a bad place that is taboo and degrading to women. Those people are the ones that do not see how the fashion industry is really affecting the world. The fashion industry is a place where women can come to be inspired, supported, and accepted. The fashion industry can support women, how they look, and their dreams. If fashion critics stopped to think about it, they would realize that the fashion industry is not just about money and image, but inspiration and confidence as well.

Works Cited:

  1. Warner, Judith. "Fashion Models and Role Models." Opinionator Fashion Models and Role Models Comments. The New York Times, 21 Sept. 2006. Web. 05 Oct. 2014.

  2. Widdicombe, Lizzie. "Reinventing Plus-Size Style." The New Yorker. N.p., 22 Sept. 2014. Web. 06 Oct. 2014.

  3. "How Women In The Fashion Industry Are Designing A Better World."Forbes. Forbes Magazine, 26 Apr. 2013. Web. 06 Oct. 2014.

  4. "Fashion Empowering Women (FEW): Non-profit Organization." Fashion Empowering Women (FEW): Non-profit Organization. N.p., n.d. Web. 07 Nov. 2014.

  5. Black, Renata M. "Designer Rachel Roy On Empowering Women Through Fashion." The Huffington Post., 06 Jan. 2014. Web. 07 Nov. 2014.


My Trapped Celeste


“That squirrwel just scared me!”

“Squirrwel? HAHAH!”

“........” *I cry on the inside*  

When I was younger I had a lisp. I would immediately get mimicked by friends or who I thought were my friends and then I would be asked me to repeat myself and then laugh. Sometimes I’d feel ashamed of how I spoke and had wished I had a british accent or something that just wasn’t the way I talked. To me speaking English had always felt easy, but when it flew out my mouth it made me want to sink under my bed covers at home. I’d always wanted better for myself, but I couldn’t change the way I spoke so I decided that I wouldn’t speak at all. Then I had become that kid who’s always in the corner. I extremly shy,

“Seeeet, Seeet.”

“No, shhhh-eet, sheet.”   


“Try again”


“See? splendid job!”

Well, since my English wasn’t perfect I had to attend speech class. My lisp would make my language sound weak. Like I’d say my Sh’s like S’s and all my S’s with my Sh’s and also my r’s like w’s. If it was sheep i’d say seep and if it was sweep i’d say shweep or even i’d get my sh’s mixed up with words that didn’t include that sound. The way I spoke made me stand out and the more I noticed I stood out, I kept my mouth shut. The language I used to say, says that I am a weak duckling and I wanted to be a clear confident and secure duckling but I couldn’t… so of that time being, I stayed to myself and kept my words to me, I and myself.

“Okay class, what’s nine plus ten?”


         *Class laughs* “No Leila, thats wrong. Do you know Corinthia?”

        “Um, nine-theen”.  *class laughs again*

        “Hush class, thats right!”

Only if I were a clear confident and secure duckling, then I could shader the laughter and mockery of others. I could show them the real me… I could stand up to anythingI could be something, known to be as wonderful. I yearned for that ever so badly. It is said from Hungry of memory that, Words were meaningfully ordered and the point was not self- expression alone but to make oneself understood by others,but my words weren't so understandable... So I started watching more British movies such as Jane Eyre, Narnia and Doctor Who, to give me senses of different speech to practice. Then I’d let their words sink to my brain so I could become perfect as them. Then I soon found myself speaking differently, it didn’t sound british at all but instead more of an Irish accent which made perfect sense cause I am Irish… but still that hadn’t changed my lisp. So I began “self- speaking teachings”, where I’d go to my bedroom and stare in the mirror and made myself sound perfect and I’d practice it every night.

“Shallow, The shallow sea wasn’t great for fishing. Shallow.”

“Shelow. The shelow, I mean the shallow sea wasn’t great for fishing. Shallow.”

“Wow!, you’re improving!!”

Pretty soon I started to notice what was said wrongly. So I then corrected myself and kept practicing. Then I realized that make myself perfect by starting over what I’ve done imperfectly. With this I encouraged myself to never give up, which had an impact with who I was. My Identity grew into someone that’d always wanted absolutely the best and I begin pressing myself for perfectness. Once my speech become clearly confident I became a snob. I thought I was better than everyone cause the way I talked. Which made me feel confident. Which was what I wanted. I received what I’d yearned for ever so long.   

“Do you want this half of my sandwich?”

         *Examines half closely* “No thanks, I don’t eat bread with the crusts.”  

         “Oh, whatever then.”

Others soon around me didn’t like me. They would make fun of me for becoming someone they couldn’t… a someone that could make the better out of their flaws. Then I’d say to myself who needs them? With their insufficient minds they don’t matter at all… I have myself and me is all thats important, people come and go and die anyways. So i’d wouldn’t care how people made fun of me, I was me and no could cease that. I soon found myself lonely but all of my teachers loved me. I was a teacher’s pet and people really hated me but I still didn’t care. I didn’t care about the teachers nor my classmates. Til this one day I became ill. I was sick. Sick with a bad cold. Whenever I’d talked I would sound like a stuffed up goose that wanted to be sent back to its smelly green old swamp. I grew sad during my sickness, all I thought about was how imperfect I sounded and felt. I felt icky. So on the nights I couldn’t look to myself in the mirror I would cry.

“And why did Laura want to visit her grandma?”

“Ummm because she felt happiness happens through palliative pursuits?”  

“What? Wrong. Corinthia I thought you read lasts nights chapter. Very disappointed.”

“I’m sorry, I haven't been feeling well lately.”

“I know, I know. Just try to catch up, would ya?”



My cold only lasted for nine days though, which had seemed like a dreaded Hell… but after I was feeling well I had to go back to school. There, whenever I opened my mouth, my speech… oh my speech, it was horrid. My voice was sore and low. I assume from all the putrid cherry cough syrup I had taken. So the shy girl I once was. My perfectness had worn off, I was now ugly, full of flaws and unacceptable. Til 7th grade came, a new girl showed me being perfect wasn’t everything. Her name was Taylor. We were bestest of friends, we’d faced pain together, joy and laughter as radiant as the sun with each other and we were the outcasts. Then soon she had to go bye bye and flew to south Carolina cause of family reasons and I then grew into someone different. Someone that’d did her very foremost quantity in everything, exquisitely.


Don’t Limit My Dialect

“Maybe I can do use this when applying for a job.” I’ll say something like that but it won’t really be my full opinion. This is pointless and is a waste of time. I don’t understand why this must be done now. I’ll think something blunt, yet truthful like this, but I wouldn’t dare say it like that. This way, I’m being respectful and courtesy to the feelings of others. My mouth and my mind are connected by thoughts and nothing more. My mind will have many thoughts about the same topic, but my mouth will filter these ideas into a single and usually positive phrase that should be said. I learned from a young age that “everything has a time and a place,” and that adjusting to these schedules is the hardest part in following this rule.

I filter what I say a lot because I can easily offend a person when I don’t. There have been many times when my mind has gotten the better of me and said something that didn’t need to be heard by others. My mouth is like a gate and my mind, a prison, ideas and sentences regularly attempting to escape away into the ears of others. No matter how big and strong the gate is, there will always be that one prisoner that escapes somehow. This is a continuing conflict when I speak with people.


“What Devia?”


“No, say it.”

This constantly gets me. I will want to say something, but stop halfway through when I come to terms with what I was about to say. It can be that my sentence may have been bad or offensive, or it just may not have made any sense. I’ve continually had to take my time and reevaluate the words that I was about to say because of the latter. Sometimes, I’ll have words ready in my head but won’t know how to phrase them correctly. Then, before I know it, I’m saying something that sounds stupid because it isn’t proper English or sounds muffled and inaudible. Even while I write this, I am still not using proper English. When I was younger, my speech wasn’t that good and I unintentionally worked to change that.

Everyday, I went to my Pre-K school and each day I had to go upstairs to a special teacher. In my brain, the brain of a 5 year old, I thought that it was just another thing to do. The teacher was actually my speech therapist; I just didn’t know she was. I was there to learn how to keep from stuttering and stumbling over words. Instead of learning anything, I remember playing a bunch of games each day and doing different activities. Little did I know that by doing these things, my speech was improving. I came from not even trying to pronounce words to sounding them out, and from barely speaking to speaking all of the time. I felt comfortable with what was supposed to be my English, but it was really just society’s view of proper English. Then I went to kindergarten.

When I began, everything was alright. Then, some weeks went by and my teacher realized that some of my words didn't sound right. My teacher was the one who recommended me to go to another speech therapist that worked in my school. When I did go, that therapist said that I didn't need her. She told me that there was no need for me to come to her any longer and everything would work itself out; I would just grow out of it. Even though that's what she told me, that never happened. I often find myself struggling to get out words or thoughts and get frustrated in the process. My speech has improved naturally and tremendously, but I still have to take my time as I say certain things because my pronunciation isn't at one hundred percent yet.

I can't help but say that my speech therapist is someone who helped me speak more. Before her, I was very uncomfortable speaking in public and with other people besides my immediate family members. I became more comfortable using the way I speak to communicate with people around me. My voice became something that I wanted to use more than not, so I began speaking. Maybe I spoke a little too much, because that’s when I started saying things that had no need to be said. This is when I had to learn what a filter was, and I had to learn how to use my filter at an early age.

No matter what was going on around me, I still had to take the time out to realize what I was saying may not be the best choice at that moment. With this, on top of having to make sure my words were correctly enunciated, my speech has always had to be something that I take my time in doing. I know that it isn’t perfect but I know that I still have time to get it there also. I’m grateful that I had the opportunity to enhance my speech with a therapist and I’m grateful that it isn’t as bad as it could be. What I say and how I say it may not always be what I mean to say, but I try to make it something that needs to be heard instead.

I may say something because it is socially acceptable, not because it is what I really think. In an 1970’s paper written by James Baldwin, he said, “Language, incontestably, reveals the speaker.” This is something that is nearly always true that I never wanted to be. People should not be able to read you by what comes out of your mouth and yet they do anyway. No one should know anything certain about you unless you have told them yourself, and this is what I try to make sure of.


My Power In Language

Principal: “Good morning! Welcome to the school and the new grade. I hope you like it.”

Students: “Good morning!”

Principal: “How are you today?”

Students: “Good. You?”

Principal: “I am good, thank you. How was your summer?”

Students: “It was nice.”

After that, the principal then proceeded to read out each student’s name and told them which room to go to and which teacher to follow. Then I couldn't understand what she was saying because of the lack of power in my English. A quote that reminds me of that moment is by Rita Mae Brown, “Language exerts hidden power, like the moon on the tides”. The language the principle was speaking I knew had power, which made everyone respond. I also had trouble understanding the accent because from where I came from was Bangladesh and there, English is spoken in a different way. English was used because different languages were used for communication. So I ended up going to the wrong room and making a fool of my self. This made me realize the power of knowing a language.  

In Bangladesh things were spoken differently and in America things were too. A Bengali and English accent are different from each other by the sound. For a Bengali accent it sounds like the letters are softer and fast spoken than those in English. For a English accent it sounds more rougher and slow spoken. English is also spoken through vowels but in Bengali there’s no structure of sound, it just flows out. When I first came to America speaking for me was hard and it was really embarrassing because everyone knew and could speak English, but I couldn't. Quoting from The Warrior Woman, to me it seemed like almost “a telephone call made my throat bleed and took up that day’s courage,” and I felt sad sometimes about it.

ESOL teacher: “Can you ask me what time is is?”

Me: “What time is it?”

ESOL teacher: “Okay now can you read me the time?”

Me: “Its uhh four thirty-six?”

ESOL teacher: “No four thirty-nine.”

Me: “ohhh.”

Soon my ESOL teacher helped me understand English better. Quoting from The Warrior Woman, “I cut it so that you would not be tongue tied. Your tongue would be able to move in any language,” she was that. She taught me how to pronounce words and what they meant. She also helped me with my handwriting and spelling, even to this very day I can’t explain myself clear but I know the basic things to help me explain because of her. To me language is power of myself and how I express me. When speaking English I always try my best to communicate what I want to say and how I say it. When I say English language I say with power because I want others to understand me and I then feel better about my language and accent. My accent may not be very fluent like an Americans talking but I know my speech is fine because I’m embracing me and my culture, from Bangladesh.

Language is a common communication amongst others that can identify things. Things like who you are, where you come from and how you describe them and we say those thing by power which is how our words come out. There are definitions for how our words come out. One is called pialet, that mean what you say and how you say it and how a person say is by their accent. Another definition of a way of how language is said is called slang. That mean new fashionable words and phrases people use because its simple and fun to understand. Another thing is that some people may not understand you even though if your speaking the same language because in different area they have different name calling for things. For example, in Philadelphia people say hoagies which to other people are “sub sandwiches”.

Apart from being a means of communication, language is also used to gain political power. Quoting from the essay If Black English Isn't a Language, Then Tell Me, What is? By James Baldwin”- “It goes without saying , then, that language is also a political instrument, means, and proof of power”. To me it means that language isn't just used for communication but also by power. For let us instance consider two people contesting for election, and one of them knows the local language. It will be easier for the person who knows the local language to gain people’s votes and support. It will also be easier for him to help people and retain his position of power. Language also gives you the power to communicate with people who speak the same language, without letting other people know what you talking about.

Over the years, I have realized the significance of a knowing a language is very crucial to our everyday life. Although, at times I feel out of place for not properly understanding everything in the English language. Over the years,I feel like I have gradually built my vocabulary words and now I’m able to function with the help and support of my teachers and peers. By my teachers and peers I have a better understanding of English and now know what to say to others so they know what i’m saying. Therefore, it is important that we understand the language in order to have power.

2fer Revision

Edward Snowden went from a loyal NSA contractor to a United States Traitor. Many people knew him to be politically conservative, very intelligent, and he was also a gun owner. No one expected this man, the most trusted man in the United States of America to be behind the biggest intelligence leak in history. Even after Edward Snowden leaked thousands of classified documents he still considers himself a patriot, and he is not the only one who agrees with this statement. Most people have agreed with Edward Snowden and his actions, but many others are deeply divided and worried by government surveillance. According to the Huffington Post Fifty-one percent of Americans said that Edward Snowden was “something of a hero” who should have been rewarded for his actions, while fifty-four percent of Americans agree that “security and anti-terrorism efforts mean we may sometimes have to infringe on civil liberties such as personal information privacy”. It is an issue that currently makes the American people question their privacy and the actions of the government. Edward Snowden’s actions have made the American people question the government and people’s safety relating to the privacy that American citizens are entitled to.

Many Americans are conflicted in what they think of Edward Snowden and his actions. The Huffington Post states that “fifty-one percent of Americans said that Edward Snowden was something of a hero who should be commended for letting the public know that the governments are running electronic surveillance programs that threaten people’s privacy”. While 49 percent labeled him more of a traitor who should be condemned for publicizing security activities and threatening western intelligence operations, along with the NSA. Edward Snowden’s actions have clearly surprised many Americans in a positive and a negative way, the previous example shows a statistic that proves that not only did part of the American government label him as a traitor but many Americans also suggested that he should have been condemned for leaking thousands of classified documents.  In response to my previous statement this situation causes people to have a hard time making sense to it because it clearly threatens western intelligence agencies that help protect security activities, but not one U.S. citizen was aware this was going on in the government.

Hero or no hero he has brought to light important information that deserved to be in the public’s reach, while doing no harm to the national security of his country. Many Americans today are genuinely and understandably torn by Edward Snowden’s actions. Even though he revealed many U.S. government actions and is now classified as a criminal, many Americans find it troubling that their privacy does not exist. It makes sense that people feel grateful to the person who brought this information to us, but is calling him a hero appropriate? In a recent interview with Edward Snowden people now have cause to doubt how much privacy they are entitled to. In this interview Edward Snowden stated, “The N.S.A. has built an infrastructure that allows it to intercept almost everything. With this capability, the vast majority of human communications are automatically ingested without targeting. If I wanted to see your emails or your wife’s phone, all I have to do is use intercepts. I can get your emails, passwords, phone records, credit cards.” This example not only shows the little privacy American citizens have but it also shows how easy it is for the government to access people’s important information that not only affects us as individuals but  families as well.

Today Edward Snowden remains a hero to some, to others he is a common criminal and wouldn’t characterized him as a hero of any kind. I believe this topic is very interesting because in though this is a issue currently going on in the United States, many people from different countries have expressed their feelings about Edward Snowden and his actions, for example in in The Huffington Post it is stated that 67 percent of the people living in Canada and 60 percent in the U.K. viewed him as a hero. Even after Edward Snowden leaked thousands of classified documents to public domain, it has come to the conclusion that the U.S. government currently uses intercepts to hack into emails, phone records, credit cards, etc. The reality of it is that American citizens have a very small amount of privacy than people think they are entitled to, which shows to point how the government contains personal information and why it is needed.

Work Cited:

Edwards-Levy, Ariel. "Americans Still Can't Decide Whether Edward Snowden Is A 'Traitor' Or A 'Hero,' Poll Finds." The Huffington Post., 30 Oct. 2013. Web. 08 Nov. 2014. <>.

"Edward Snowden: 'I'd Volunteer for Prison' to Return to US." TODAY. N.p., n.d. Web. 06 Oct. 2014.

Why Edward Snowden Is a Hero - The New Yorker." The New Yorker. Http://, n.d. Web. 06 Oct. 2014.

"Quora." Why Do Some Americans Believe Edward Snowden Is Not a Hero? -. N.p., n.d. Web. 06 Oct. 2014.


I first edited the mistakes that Ms.Pahomov had commented onto my google document, after I resolved the comments I looked for words that I know are not allowed in 2fer essays. Secondly, I had one of my peer's peer edit my essay just in case there were any mistakes that I couldn't see, there were a couple that my peer found but I fixed them just in time. I then clicked my sources cited to make sure that they were the right ones, I used a couple of sources but they weren't in the right order at first. I also tried to fix some of my paragraphs that repeated, I think I did a pretty good job trying to make it more sightful. If I could change anything I would change the sentence structures of my essay.


2fer Revision

Nagee Graves September 17, 2014

" Are you gay or straight?". There's a common mistake in that sentence, try to find it. That simple question could come off to some as insulting  only because they were the only two options. Due to the opinion that they are confused or haven’t fully accepted themselves yet, bisexuals experience a significant amount of discrimination from both society in general and the LGBT community.  There is no legitimate reasoning in why people do not accept bisexuality as a real thing, but there have been some futile attempts. The most popular defense being that it's impossible to like both sexes and that if a male is attracted to another male in any form, he is overall gay.

Tom Daley, a famed olympic diver known for his specialty in 10 meter dives , identified last year as an open bisexual man. Laying in his bed he told the world that he’s dating a man and proceeded on with “...of course I still fancy girls.” (NYT). With all the world taking to the media to talk express their feelings about the situation, Daley left them with a sweet ending of “but, I mean, right now, I’m dating a guy, and I couldn’t be happier” (NYT). Fast forward a few months, Tom Daley is in the news yet again, except this time it’s to say that he’s “a gay man now”. What is wrong with this is that bisexuality is made out to be real only in the sense that it aids in the identity transition. Though what Tom Daley did does not prove that there are no bisexuals in the world, his actions only increased the argument that people who claim the title “bi”, are the same people who are lying themselves to sleep at night.

A young man by the name of Charles M. Blow, wrote a memoir about his life and experiences from his younger life. An excerpt from his book stated when he received a call his older cousin, who he hinted had raped him. Without thought he went to his car, grabbed his gun and sped down the highway to his mother’s house. Somewhere between the phone call and seeing his campus’ exit, he snapped into the realization that his cousin, in some way, helped his understand himself more. “In addition to being attracted to women, I could also be attracted to men...male attraction was such a simple little harmless idea, but I had allowed it to consume and almost ruin my life” (CMB).  The title “bi” was still a new thing to him and it would take time to adjust. With this new part of his life exposed, the idea that only a few people would understand what’s going on with him was strange. The real question was with the people who thought this was “a transitory identity — a pit stop or a hiding place — and not a permanent one” (CMB). They would never understand him, nor would he them.

It’s hard for people who come as bi as people have a hard time grasping the concept. People often come to the conclusion that bisexuals can never be fully committed to their partner because half of their heart belongs to the other sex. Marriage can never be  something a bisexual can engage in because “If you are married to a woman, they may assume that you're going to get divorced, or that you don't really love your wife” (THP). The misconception that bisexuals will always have someone else in their heart is the reason people will believe this is just a pit-stop in their life.  Mark Cohen wrote an article about telling his wife of 13 years about his sexuality. They agree that their marriage was over, but in the sense that it would never be the way it was before. Mark stated that he “thought it would be the end of us. Instead, it was a whole new beginning.” (MBC). His wif.e agreed that it’s something could open their marriage and lead them to new adventure, not to a divorce.

The discrimination against bisexuals is still unexplainable. Straight or a part of the LGBT community, the simple act of dismissing someone’s identity because “people aren’t able to love more than one person”, is ignorant. There is still no legitimate proof on why people dismiss bisexaulity as a real identity, even after there is evidence. If members of the LGBTQ community and the general population of society stopped to think about it, they would realize that bisexuality is not just about / does not just involve being able to date both genders whenever one chooses , but to express and identify oneself in the way that defines them most as well. Invalidating someone's sexuality because of pure ignorance is contributing to the reason people are afraid to not be themselves.


  1. Schulman, Michael. "Bisexual: A Label With Layers." The New York Times. The New York Times, 4 Jan. 2014. Web. 21 Sept. 2014. (NYT)

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  1. Blow, Charles. "Up From Pain." The New York Times. The New York Times, 19 Sept. 2014. Web. 22 Sept. 2014. (CMB)

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  1. RichardsFink, Patrick. "For Bi Guys Thinking of Coming Out." The Huffington Post., 28 Jan. 2013. Web. 22 Sept. 2014. (THP)

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  1. Cohen, Mark B. "Coming out to My Wife." Saloncom RSS. Salon, n.d. Web. 22 Sept. 2014. (MBC)

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While revising my paper, I worked most on improving my conclusion. I used the sentences that we made from the workshop in class to edit strengthen it. I had to make revisions on the wording of my sentences as well as the structure. With a quote, I was told to move around the name of the person being quoted, but ti didn't look right or seem correct to me.


My Language, My Life

My language, My life

“Ah yo, come here real quick” they always say.

“Naw I’m chillin’. Imma just go in the other direction.” I answer.

“What I say.”

“I don’t care, so what you gonna do stupid.”

“You think this is a game, huh?”

“Yeah always. All day every day, keepin’ it one hunnit. Thought y’all knew me by now.”

“Yeah there he is. My manz is back (laughing continues). What you been up to?”

“Nothing much really. Just chilling as always.”

“You still down for the party?”

“I don’t know. Momz not going out tonight.”

“Come on man, you got to. I know you remember what happened last time. Now don’t lie, it was crazy sick.”

“Yeah I know, but I can’t always do it. Remember I’m trynna go places. I can’t have this coming back at me. I got ya’ll next time ard.”

“Yeah yeah but bail on us next time then.”

My old friends...always able to speak freely with them. They were the ones to get me to open up. You know, actually live a little. It was because of them that I was to have fun. Before I met them, I jut nothing but study, which is good but I wasn’t haven’t any fun. And at that moment that we started to hang, I got my new idea of the world. I figured out that I couldn’t be happy with myself if I wasn’t able to have fun and so I did. I adapted to their way of speech, and understood their mindset, but I didn’t let that control me. I wanted to have that in mind, but still able to obtain new ways of communication.

My mind is continuously moving. Constantly reminding myself not to fall into the trap. It’s trying to stay above ground, no slip ups, no mistakes. I really wanted to go, I really did, but I would be pushing it with all the extra work my new school likes to give me. I didn’t really expect it all, but I choose the school because it would help me better myself. It gave me new opportunities to explore so I can experience all I need to. I need to be able to make a difference.

“Can  I get a ‘Amen’ now?” says pastor. “I said can I get a ‘Amen’!”


“We have here today brother Kareem and he wants to say something to the church this Sunday morning.”

“Well really I just wanted to thank you all for helping me get further in life. You all have motivated me to push harder, strive for the best, conquer the odds, and be a better person that people outside of here will know as the one who succeed. The trials you put me through has proven that I can live up to the challenge, but the only fight left is with myself. Thank you.”

That was when I was the worship leader for one service. They caught me coming back from my vacation and I just decided to just do it. I was able to lead the service, tell them what’s going on, and afterwards they wanted me to say something in response. So I said that to them, and that left them a little shocked. They didn’t think that I noticed what they did for me over the years, and so that was just one of the many things I did to repay the favor.

Me personally I have a mask over my face that I’m always doing the best I can making it seem like I’m someone else, but truthfully, they both are me. They’re just the different sides of me. You have the civilized, and the uncivilized me. They just change with the degree of my mood.

“Yes mother. I did that already. No you can’t do that. Just let me fix the wires when I get home okay? Okay bye.”

“She needs your help again?”

“Yeah but it’ll wait, I gotta finish this first. This is just too cool to miss.”

They show the side of me that fits with you better. The side of me that you’ll most likely accept. I don’t really mean to, but it kind of just happens. I do it to find my place, to get a better understanding of myself, to know what I need to do in order to succeed. These voices, sounding different, all show the pieces of me. It’s just your job to fit them together so you hear, see, feel, know everything that I do. So really, I feel like I don’t change myself. Yes I code switch, but I only do it so people can understand me. From one to the other, the change makes me fit in. The change is my way to survive.



“Excuse me!”

“Yes. How may I help you?”

“You better watch yourself”

“How can I help you?”

“Just do what you have to do in the house.”

“Yeah okay.”

“What was that?”

“Yes master. I mean mom”

Just a usual confrontation with my mom. It’s not bad, but since it happened so much, I started changing my way of responding. You saw I said “master” and at this point it comes out from time to time. I can’t use my regular way of speaking when it comes to her even though she uses it towards me. It seems a bit backwards but I just switch it so she can understand me.

My way of survival changes from scene to scene. From my friends, to school, to home. With friends, I just try to fit in, with school, I try to succeed, and at home, I feel like I become something different other than me. All these places have a different way of talking. It goes from leisure to force, all I can do is adapt accordingly. Sometimes I wish no matter how I want to talk, people will understand but that’s not the case. Sometimes I feel like they are trying to hide that part of himself from others, or they just feel like one way of speaking is better than others. So really that makes me feel like language has power. One way of speaking portrays one scenario, and the other is used to get the same point across but just in a way for someone else to understand. That’s really all that makes sense.
1 Comment

Why Teachers Take So Long to Grade.

Nashay Day

Air Stream


      Educators are universally vital in order for humans to continue flourishing as a race and these educators give assignments. When they assignments are given there are usually four kinds of students: the student who complete the assignment early, the student who completes the assignment on time, the student who hands in the assignment late, and the student who just doesn't hand in the assignment. However the common thread that connect these students with distinct differences is grading. Ironically, teachers at SLA are more compelled to mark an assignment as a zero if it missing than to grade an assignment that was turned in on time. One would think that teachers would be more compelled to do vice versa (grade the students who turn in work early or on time) but instead they grade assignments as zeroes first because it teaches diligence to students and keeps them on there toes. The bonus for them appears that they can take there time in doing this.

According 4th Grade teacher Debbie Gosdell there are specific kinds of teachers, she stated that "writing is a subject that many teachers do not enjoy grading." Additionally according to HP, "the hardest job" she's ever had also the most satisfying.” This argument goes to show that teachers may in fact enjoy their jobs in general, but there are certain things that they dread. One of them being grading papers. However, this has to have stemmed from  somewhere, teachers go to school, get a degree and traditionally teachers grade assignments, it would be absurd to that educators were unaware that grading papers were fundamental responsibility of the job.

Moreover, there are others inconsistencies in the relationship between teachers and grading, another one being the fact that in some cases, grades may not be proportional. Another author from the Huffington Post states “An essay that earns a B+ at one moment might earn a B- the next day. It shouldn't be that way, but any honest teacher will admit it's true.” Teachers are constantly attempting to enforce mindsets of consistency and m into their students, however it appears now that the act of doing so is hypocritical. Additionally, just as there are students who are different, similarly, there are just as many different kinds of teachers. That being stated, all teachers may not be the seem, but there is a common thread that connects them all together as well. That thread being grading methods.

All teachers grade differently, however all of them grade (unless they display complete and utter inadequacy when grading). There are a select few who are completely well-round and are efficient from any and every angle however, those are anomalies, and all teachers aren't able to be compared on the same scale. Additionally, according to an article by Alfie Kohn, he goes into depth about the fundamentals of grading. Kohn states " Never grade students while they are still learning something and, even more important, do not reward them for their performance at that point. Studies suggest that rewards are most destructive when given for skills" this is an additional reason why teachers are more compelled to spend surplus time grading.

In conclusion, teachers all grade differently, however, it seems that little to none of them grade expeditiously. It may not be due to that fact that all teachers are lazy and socially inept. It proves to be due to various reasons, but as stated previously, the common thread that connects it all is that fact that it actually does occur, and these occurrences are frequent between students and educators internationally. Teachers are compelled to put in zeroes to encourage students to become print and on task, not to be devious, it is just an act of tough love. Thus enabling students to do better so that the grading process can be thorough and enjoyable (for a select few).

2fer Final Draft

Brittany Cooper  

Air Stream

The double standard rule according to is any code or set of principles containing different provisions forone group of people than for another, especially an unwrittencode of sexual behavior permitting men more freedom than women.”  

There are certain expectations that society already has set out for individuals. Whether a man or a woman, gender roles will always have a judgement on certains actions. The common double standard rule affects women just as much as men. An example of the double standard rule is the controversy of the physical interaction of men and women abusively. Its in unacceptable for a man to put his hands on a woman. But okay for a woman to put her hands on a man if it means “defending” herself.  It's about the double standard that actually punishes men for domestic violence MORE than women.

Due to the fact that society portrays men in a certain way he is bound to act tough and obtain control at all times. Researchers believe that there is a universal gender role towards men. It is said  all men are to server as a protector and a provider. Researchers also believe that there is a universal gender role towards men. It is said  all men are to server as a protector and a provider. As a protector they should defend what is theirs. As a provider they should insure the safety and take care of those whom belong.

When being an athlete they are sponsored by many high endurance companies. As an famous athlete in a public eye, conducting oneself accordingly is a must.  are responsible for the actions as individual and when associating with others from another group. Why is it acceptable for a woman who was charged with a assault keep her NSL career but Ray Rice charged with assault as well is at the process of losing his job.  This brings you back to domestic violence. According to the MintPress News, women are three times more likely to be killed or seriously injured by their male counterpart than vice versa. However more than  830,000 men are a victim to domestic violence every year. Every 37.8 seconds a man is a victim of domestic violence. In 2001, The National Longitudinal Study of Adolescent Health surveyed about 14,320 people between the age of 18 & 28, a statistic was discovered. When committing acts of domestic violence more women than men were responsible( 25% vs. 11%).  

Hope Solo, 33, is a Women’s National soccer player. Her position on the team is goalkeeper. She has been goalkeeping since 2000. In June 23,2014 Hope Solo, was arrested on the charger of domestic violence according to the NY Post. She allegedly got into a physical altercation with two family members. It is told that Solo was supposedly intoxicated at the time of the altercation according to police. One victim, identifying as a 17- year old nephew, who bleeding from a cut from his ear.  When she attacked her nephew punching him in the face, while saying that his was “too fat & crazy” to be a pro athlete. Another victim as her half sister who’s was left with a cheekbone that was swollen and purple. Who tried to break up the fight. Hope Solo has pleaded not guilty to two counts of misdemeanor domestic violence. She is scheduled to go to trial in November. If she found guilty she can face up to 6 months in jail. With all this being said the U.S Soccer in still allowing her to play in U.S -WNT.

Ray Rice, 27, is a football player for The National Football League. He is a running back for the Baltimore Ravens. He was drafted in 2008, and has played as a Ravens player since 2008. On March 27, 2014 Ray rice was charged with 3rd degree aggravated assault. He was caught on camera punching his the Fiance now wife unconscious in a elevator. This is prior to his arrest of domestic violence on February 15, after having a physical altercations with his then fiancée, Janay Palmer at the Revel Casino in Atlantic City, NJ according to ESPN  as well is at the process of losing his job.

However a recent video posted by TMZ shows that Janay Palmer hit Rice while walking in the elevator. When they enter the elevator there was a exchangement of words. At that point Rice leans his face towards Palmer, which lead to Janay to shove Rice away. any his finacée by her arms out of an elevator, laying her on the floor.  ( → Link to the Video ) .

As a result according to NBC Sports, Ray Rice is currently suspended indefinitely by the NFL. However Ray Rice is filing for an appeal on the indefinite suspension. The decision towards suspending Ray Rice was appropriate . However he should not be suspended indefinitely. I say this because Hope Solo is being charged on similar accounts and still is able to keep her career. Just because you are a woman does not give up the right to be able to be physical with a person in a negative way, as to a man. Domestic Violence should not be viewed based upon gender but upon acts .

Work Sited

  1. NBC Sports. "Ray Rice to Appeal Indefinite Suspension On Monday." ProFootballTalk. Independent Programming Report, 2012-2014. Web. 06 Oct. 2014. <>.

  2. "Hope Solo and the Domestic Violence Case No One Is Talking about." Washington Post. The Washington Post, n.d. Web. 05 Oct. 2014. <>.

  3. Peyser, Andrea. "Double Standard Allows Soccer Star Hope Solo to Stay in the Game." New York Post. NYP Holdings, Inc., 06 Oct. 2014. Web. 06 Oct. 2014. <>.

  4. Services, News. "Ravens' Ray Rice indicted." ESPN. ESPN Internet Ventures, 28 Mar. 2014. Web. 05 Oct. 2014. <>.

  5. "Woman As Aggressor: The Unspoken Truth Of Domestic Violence." MintPress News. N.p., n.d. Web. 08 Nov. 2014. <>.


Two-fer Revison

Felix d’Hermillon

English Twofer Rough Draft

If Seaworld and other aquatic prisons stopped to think about it, they would realize that orca whales being contained in captivities is not just about showboating the animals , but is deeply hurting the animals well being as well. This is something that is not acknowledged in todays world and should be addressed. Something needs to be done about this and it needs to be made more public with what is going on. They are put in these captivities against their will, and are Killer whales (aka orca whales) are the largest of the dolphin family. They are extremely strong predators. They are on average the size of a school bus. They hunt in pods with their family of about 40 whales, so if one of the whales is bad, imagine being hunted by 40 whales. Killer whales hunt other mammals in the ocean such as seals and sea lions. Killer whales tend to live in colder places. Killer whales are animals that are extremely friendly but it is needed to know that any situation with humans involved with killer whales can go south in a split second.

Seaworld damaged the whales immediately from the start. The way they caught them was unacceptable, and sea world keeps  in spaces that are way too small for mammals of their size. These spaces are unacceptable. They are not only shoving them into these tiny spaces, but they are also putting more than one animal into these captivities, and they are harming each other as well. When Tilikum was just admitted into sea land, he was kept in a very small container for ⅔’s  of his life, and the other ⅓ of his life he was in a show or he was training for the show. This container was 20 feet in length and 30 foot depth water. The whales themselves are on average 20-26 feet long.  While he was in the container, he was with several other whales. They would do what is call raking ,when other whales rub their teeth against the skin of one whale, throughout the night and he would come out with scratches and cuts all over his body. He was in Sea Land until he killed Keltie Byrne. Keltie Byrne was an orca whale trainer for sea world. Shortly after the death they closed sea land, and auctioned off the whales. These whales are being driven crazy. They are rebelling. The whales did not do anything to be captured and kept as prisoners in the captivities. They didn’t do anything until kept in captivities. If they were released there would be no controversy.

Conflicting with the name that they were given, killer whales are extremely friendly in the wild. This is true because the  There has never been a reported killer whale on a human in the wild. On the contrary, there has been many attacks of trainers in se world and or any other wild life aquatic captivities. Sea world has had so countless numbers of killer whale attacks. Keltie Byrne was attacked in SeaWorld, was killed by Tilikum, a whale who has killed three trainers. A whale who is known for killing. Keltie was walking along side of the pool with Tilikum and two other whales in the pool. Keltie tripped and fell in the pool. Tilikum grabbed her foot and dragged her to the bottom of the tank. He drowned her. Dawn Brancheau died at the hand of Tilikum as well. He scalped her, broke her bones and drowned her. Daniel P. Dukes, a man that broke into SeaWorld at night and went for a late night swim with Tilikum was found dead the next day. Tilikum killed the man over night. He was found with countless injuries leading to his death. This is all from being kept in captivity. They need to be released. It is not healthy for them to be contained in small captivities and they also should be with their own kind. They should be able to stare off into the water and not see any walls. They should see their family and be in their presence.

These killer whales were and still are being driven to psychosis. Killer whales swim an average of 95 miles a day, but if they are in captivities they are unable to. These whales are being kept in these tiny prisons for their entire life of course they are gonna snap. Imagine if a somebody was being kept in a basement for their entire life. Of course they are going try and rebel. It’s the instinct to survive, and just because the killer whales are trying to survive, doesn’t mean that they are terrible animals that are killers. It means that they will try to survive and all of  this behavior was all caused by frustration the whale was feeling. The press made these animals out to be stone cold killers when in fact they are quite the opposite. They should be respected and left alone in the wild.

Everything points to Killer whales suffering when they are in captivities. They are caught very cruelly, suffer from injuries when kept in tanks, suffer from other whale attacks, and try to rebel and kill humans out of frustration. They will never live up to their full potential when they are kept in tanks like that. Killer whales are animals with rights and they do not deserve to be kept in facilities.

Works Cited

"Killer Whales (Orcas), Killer Whale Pictures, Killer Whale Facts - National Geographic."National Geographic. N.p., n.d. Web. 21 Sept. 2014.

"30 Years and Three Deaths: Tilikum's Tragic Story - SeaWorld of Hurt." SeaWorld of Hurt. N.p., n.d. Web. 21 Sept. 2014.

BlackFish”. Dir. Gabriela Cowperthwaite. 2013. Online Movie.

"11 Things You Didn't Know About SeaWorld - SeaWorld of Hurt." SeaWorld of Hurt. N.p., n.d. Web. 21 Sept. 2014.

1 Comment

Amelia Stuart's 2fer Revision

As more and more children come into the world screens and keyboards are thrust into their hands. It is familiar to them because they see their friends or their parents using them. Something else to consider is social media and the effect it has on teenagers lives, as they open their laptops and close their doors.  Today's young people are growing up disconnected from nature by spending so much time in front of a screen, therefore in the future they will value the natural world less than any prior generation.

There are multiple opinions on this topic, some supporting the idea of active technology in childrens lives, others saying it is time to limit the time we spend glued to the glowing screens. It is not hard to find a child on the couch watching a movie instead of running outside and enjoying the fresh air. The neglection of nature will follow them into their adults lives, and impact how they will see the world compared to their parents or grandparents. They will value nature less in their adult lives, and these are our future politicians, business owners, teachers.

A study done by a New York University found that 55% of 12 year olds were registered on Facebook , while a survey of children in Britain concluded at 34%. Another study was done by The Kaiser Foundation, a US welfare institute, the study found that children as young as eight spend an average of 7 hours and 38 minutes on the screen every day.  The distraction implicated by social media and television are majorly involved in the disconnection from nature, for everyone, not just children.

Adults are using their screens for everyday activities mainly their jobs, however it is not just children who are becoming disconnected. In fact it is not right to blame children for the large presence of technology in their lives, children see their parents texting during dinner or spending nights in front of the television they’re going to do the same.

Some schools are to give out laptops, others give out iPads, and smartboards replace chalkboards. This is not a bad thing, in fact it could make the lives of teachers easier, but if students are spending so much of their free time and their school or work time what happens when the screen is taken away? The Pali institute, an outdoor education camp for public school children and Children's Digital Media Center @LA at UCLA found a group of approximately 100 6th graders over a period of five days. They all had absolutely no access to screens of any kind. The study found that children's skills in reading the emotion in other childrens faces got dramatically better. The time they spent interacting in groups, with their peers and counselors, made an important difference. The kids at the camp improved their understanding of emotion, they were able to spend five days without technology.

Although children might not think that conserving nature matters much, their influence goes beyond watching the nature channel on TV to leading a litter pick up in their neighborhood.  Since they are young they need to be pushed by their parents to get off the couch and spend more time outside, ultimately going on to helping their neighborhood become more appreciative of nature. It is much easier to sit on the couch and spend two hours catching up on shows than it is to spend two hours picking up apple cores, however everyone, of all ages should try to spend at least two hours outside. Not necessarily picking up trash, but reading a book, drawing, or just sitting and appreciating the view.


Language & Stereotypes

   Language is perceived the way it is due to a combination of many factors. While the words may be spelled one way on paper, they are often spoken differently, and to another speaker, they may sound completely different. The way a language is spoken contributes to English speakers’ stereotypes  about speakers of that language.

   One example of this is Arabic. The Arabic language has many "velar" and "uvular" sounds that English doesn't have. An example of a velar sound is the final sound in the word "loch". To make that sound, one has to make a "k" sound, but in the back of the throat. An Arabic example of this is the word "خضراء” (“xaḍrāʾ”), which means “green”.

Velar and uvular sounds can sound harsh to people who don’t speak Arabic. The non-Arabic speaking wife of an Arabic speaker notes that, “When I listen to my husband and his friends speak most of the time I assume there is something wrong or they are disagreeing with something [...] the words to me seem harsh and very pronounced.” As noted in the quote, these sounds contribute to stereotypes about Arabic - namely, the stereotype that Arabic people are “aggressive”, as velar sounds often sound harsh and abrasive to English speakers.

   Another example  is Chinese. The Chinese languages, especially Mandarin Chinese, are some of the most stereotyped languages in the world. Chinese has six variants of a single sound, “t͡ɕ”, which is similar to “t͡ʃ”, a sound that English speakers spell "ch". This, combined with their common use of the "ng" sound, help create the most common stereotype of Chinese: "ching chong". A rhyme that was common in the early twentieth century plays off of this:

Ching Chong, Chinaman,
Sitting on a wall.
Along came a white man,
And chopped his tail off.

While incredibly racist, this rhyme shows how the sound of the language can contribute to stereotypes- not just the “ching chong” stereotype, but the idea that Chinese people are “outsiders” who don’t belong. This mindset is much less of a problem in languages that share many sounds with English, such as Dutch and German.

A third example of this is French. The French stereotype is very popular in America, especially the stereotype that “ze Fhhrench speak like zees” and laugh nasally like “hon hon hon”. These stereotypes stem from French phonology, where r’s are trilled (/ʁ/), some vowels are nasal (/ɑ̃/), there’s no “th” sound, and there’s no /ɪ/ (like in English “bin”). This is often made fun of, as the nasal vowels in French can seem almost “uppity” to some English listeners. According to the site TV Tropes, these stereotypes are common in television, with a few famous examples being “Inspector Clouseau in The Pink Panther, Lumière in Beauty and the Beast, all the French characters in 'Allo 'Allo!, and Pepe Le Pew.” In addition, these stereotypes can also make French people seem goofy, as shown by the fact that many characters in entertainment have stereotypical French accents for no apparent reason. One example is in the movie Shrek, where Robin Hood speaks English with a French accent for no reason other than to generate laughs.

In conclusion, one can deduce that the way a language sounds can affect stereotypes of speakers of that language. Some sounds can seem agressive, like Arabic /x/. Some sounds can seem otherly, like Chinese /t͡ɕ/. Other sounds can even sound goofy, like French /ɑ̃/. The cooperation of these sounds with other sounds from their languages can give the languages a personality that is projected onto speakers of that language.

Works Cited

"How Does Arabic Sound to Foreigners?" How Does Arabic Sound to Foreigners? EgyptSearch, 23 July 2004. Web. 18 Sept. 2014.

Newman, D. The Phonetics of Arabic (n.d.): n. pag. Durham University Community. Durham University. Web. 18 Sept. 2014.

Duanmu, San. "Chinese (Mandarin), Phonology of." Encyclopedia of Language and Linguistics,. 2nd ed. N.p.: Elsevier House, n.d. Print.

Lee, Mary Paik, and Sucheng Chan. Quiet Odyssey: A Pioneer Korean Woman in America. Seattle: U of Washington, 1990. Print.

"National Stereo Types: Western Europe." TV Tropes. TV Tropes Foundation, LLC, n.d. Web. 22 Sept. 2014.

Elkhoury, John. "French Phonetics." French Crazy. N.p., 18 Mar. 2014. Web. 22 Sept. 2014.


Christian Moore 2Fer

No one likes being bored, this is the reason the entertainment industry makes so much money every year. Every week professional athletes put their bodies on the line to entertain the public. But the question is do sports fans value entertainment more than safety? Sports such as football, boxing, and bull riding are very physically demanding jobs, everyday people are seriously injured from doing these activities. People keep supporting the sports industry even though it is dangerous to the players just because it is entertaining.

In recent years, the NFL has been doing research to see the long term effect of football on its players. These studies are the result of former players now starting lawsuits against the NFL for hiding the long term consequences of the sport, even though they knew the risk. Neurologists have determined that football can lead to many brain diseases, a major one being CTE or Chronic Traumatic Encephalopathy. Some people who suffer from this have been known to have very short memories and others have even taken their own lives to try to cope with the pain the disease comes with. CTE includes symptoms such as memory loss, impaired judgement, anxiety, depression, and suicidality just to name a few. CTE also leads to Alzheimer's disease or worse ALS. Fans are very well aware of the consequences of playing professionally. This still does not stop them from encouraging huge hits and dangerous contact. Some players receive blows to the helmet and fans cheer for the collision. These same fans then turn to say that they would not allow their children to play the sport. Hall of fame quarterback Brett Farve said in an interview that even though he loves the sport is and glad he played, he would not allow his son to play a sport that violent. This shows that the safety of others is not important to them as long as they are entertained in the process. When injuries happen people even mock the player who has been injured, This is horrible and inhumane in every way possible.

The NFL is now involved in many lawsuits from former players for negligence and fraud because of head traumas found after their playing careers. An example of this is former NFL cornerback Paul Oliver. His repetitive head traumas led him to become moody, have memory loss, and anger issues. As a result of this, he shot himself in the head in front of his wife and children.His family and neurologist claim the suicide was a "direct result of the injuries, depression and emotional suffering caused by repetitive head trauma and concussions suffered as a result of playing football, not properly appreciating football's risks with respect to head trauma"   They say the NFL knew the long term risk of the sport but hid them.

Unlike football, the intent in boxing is to physically beat an opponent. The whole concept of the sport is violent. Fighters come into the match expecting to knock their opponent unconscious. Some doctors will call the process a severe concussion because of the similar trauma experienced. Muhammad Ali now suffers from Parkinson's disease because of the many blows taken to the head in his career. This has essentially left him paralyzed for the rest of his life.  The list of boxing injuries goes on and on.  The sport is so violent that some have even been brutally beaten to death in the ring. Spectators care in absolutely no way. They instead come up with sayings like if you cant take the beating stay out of the ring. Boxing has generated a lot of its money through bets placed by fans. This is something they can do to entertain themselves while the fighters spend months training for a fight. People then throw parties to watch the fight. The whole time they cheer for a certain fighter to knock the other out.

Unlike football and boxing bull riding does not have as many fans, but still has a reputable amount of fans. These fans come to rodeos to see if their favorite cowboy can stay on a bull for 8 seconds. The fans in this sport don’t necessarily cheer for violence but do support it in one way or another. Some fans cheer hoping their cowboys make it the 8 seconds to qualify and others stand hoping they fall off. When a rider falls off the bull, he is in more danger than most people will ever be in. Unlike a head to head collision in football or a strong uppercut in boxing, when hit by a 2,000 pound angry animal most people may not get up. Fans never want to see this happen but do support the idea of the sport. They love the thrill and anticipation of every ride knowing inside what could happen if those 8 seconds are not reached. Fans are entertained by the idea of not knowing what could happen in the run.

Many of the activities that are adorned by sports fans are very dangerous. Some like the sports for the competitive nature, and others just like the violence. Entertaining nowadays is not cheap. It has cost some people their lives, something that can never be repaid.

Veronica Nocella's 2fer Revision

During human life, there are many different oppertunities people have to conflict with themselves, all of them having to do with fitting into a specific category of person. Questions about identity are incredibly common, due to the discomfort one receives when feeling abnormal or different. It’s natural to feel such a way, which is why categories are established- to feel normal, and to be able to simplify others to feel comfortable with them. These different categories/binaries include race, class, interest, occupation, and one of the largest, gender. We see gender in every social system; whether it be in schools, at work, or simply when having to use the bathroom. The gender binary pressures individuals to classify themselves as one gender or another, specifically the gender that pertains to their sex,  leading to misconceptions about the existence of genderfluidity or any exploration of gender.

Monique Slusher, the author of an article explaining what it means to be “genderfluid,”  uses a metaphor of three cups: one labeled “woman,” another “man,” and a third with no label at all. One some days, they say that the woman cup will be completely full; because they feel like a woman completely in every aspect. One other days, the man cup will be full, because they feel like a mix of both a man and a woman. And on some days the unlabeled up will be full, because being “man” or “woman” doesn’t describe how they feel at all on that day. (The Pacific Index.)  The idea of genderfluidity is having a completely flexible and ever changing gender identity. The fact that this concept is extremely uncommon and at times causes lots of distress and discomfort proves the oppressiveness of the gender binary. The pressure to simply be “man” or “woman” and to completely live as man or woman puts pressure on individuals to identify themselves specifically as one gender or another.

A Sand Creek high school in Colorado Springs  caused quite an uproar when they crowned a transgender student, Scarlett Lenh, to be homecoming princess. One parent had even said "I'm very sympathetic that he's transgender, but he should be on the boy's side, not the girl's." A high school junior also stated that  “I think it’s wrong because he’s actually a guy, he’s not a girl, and he hasn’t been doing this his entire life – he’s only been doing it recently.” ( Because Lenh identifies as a girl, she is still part of the binary. However,  both of these statements prove in multiple ways the negative effect of the gender binary, because of the automatic use of personal, masculine pronouns to describe Lenh, only because she was a boy at birth. The idea one must stay on the “boy’s side” because they were a boy is language that clearly states the discomfort in anything that doesn't completely cooperate with the binary that has been established, which is therefore why so much pressure is put on individuals to classify as one specific gender for their entire existence, and that any exploration of gender cannot exist.

When asked, people who aren't directly affected by the gender binary might say that only the trans community, genderqueer, genderfluid, and other individuals that identify outside the binary are affected, but on closer inspection, every social institution built around the binary that accommodates cisgender individuals directly causes the oppressiveness of the binary, such as same gender schools, camps, sports, and even bathrooms. These are the things that more deeply ingrain the binary into people's subconscious, and leads to further distress and judgement towards others who simply cannot follow or participate in these social institutions, and can therefore not live a comfortable life. It is important to understand that sex and gender are two completely different things; just because someone was born with specific body parts doesn’t mean that they must do everything according to the gender society assigns those body parts for the rest of their life. It is much more important to acknowledge and appreciate one’s being, instead of always trying to classify it.


Ameer Forte's 2Fer Essay

Football Allows Domestic Violence by Ameer Forte

American football players are average people, who live average lives and have average negative tendencies. Crime is crime no matter who commits it, right? Why then, does it seem like the average football player can manage to get away with illegal acts that the average person can’t get away with? In fact, there are players in the NFL currently who have committed domestic violence crimes. Creating a national debate whether or not they have been under punished for their actions and raising much controversy around decisions made by league commissioner Roger Goodell. The truth is, American football allows its athletes to get away with domestic violence for the benefit of the league's profit.

Ray McDonald, a defensive lineman for the San Francisco 49ers, was arrested on Sunday, August 31st on felony domestic violence charges involving his fiancee. This happened just a week after a new rule had been passed by the league, this rule enforced that a player has to carry himself in a certain way when representing his organization, and if he did not the league has the ability to fine him, suspend him without pay or indefinitely suspend him from the NFL. The Sacramento Bee reports Police arrived at McDonald’s house at approximately 2:00 am where McDonald seemed to have some sort of altercation with his fiancee, they found his fiancee bruised and beat and he was taken into custody. McDonald posted $25,000 bail and was released from Santa Clara county jail later that day. Roger Goodell released a statement later that week saying that there would be stronger punishment for players like McDonald, and that there would now be an automatic six game suspension for players with a domestic violence charge. Except, McDonald has not been suspended. In fact, the NFL reports, McDonald is being very involved in the San Francisco 49ers games despite his alleged crimes. Roger Goodell explained his case though, saying, as long as McDonald isn't charged with actual evidence he will be continued to be allowed to play. Roger Goodell is letting McDonald play because when he is on the field the San Francisco 49ers have a better chance of winning, and more winning means more fans, and more fans means more income for the league’s profit.

Would an average working man who beat his wife be allowed to keep his job? Or would he just be temporarily suspended for his actions? According to Colorado criminal law for example,  “A conviction for a criminal offense related to domestic violence may result in loss of the defendant’s job.” Which means no leisure, no suspensions, no protection as NFL players would get. There is no special treatment for the average worker. For example, in 2006 a man named Rafael Dangond was found reportedly beating his wife from the time they attended a wedding after party to the time they made it home that evening. She was found by her father, bloodied and bruised, the next day. Dangond was ultimately sentenced to 5 years in prison. Dangond was unable to escape the punishment he earned, Whereas an NFL player appears to be able to get away will full scale domestic violence without the correct punishment because of the fact that they bring in revenue for profit.

Ray Rice, a running back for the Baltimore Ravens, was arrested on February 15 along with his fiancee on simple assault charges. A video released to the public of Rice dragging his fiance across an elevator floor. Rice’s attorney assured it was just a minor altercation between the two, and when Roger Goodell was asked if the league was aware of the incident and whether there will be discipline, he stated, "The answer to that is yes. And I don't know on the second part. We will let the facts dictate that." On July 24th the NFL decided to suspend Ray Rice for just two games, even after his charges were upped to aggravated assault weeks before. The league made the conscious decision to only suspend Ray Rice for two games while knowing he had been arrested and convicted of domestic violence, the rule that they enforced was that as long as Rice was not charged by his fiance he would still be able to represent the league, allowing Rice to continue to play as soon as his short suspension is over and once again showing the NFL give soft punishment to one of it’s athletes who have committed domestic violence.

On September 8th a new video surfaced showing Rice punching his fiance in the face and knocking her unconscious. Here is where the fishy activity gets noticed. When that video came out Roger Goodell claimed "We had not seen any videotape of what occurred in the elevator, We assumed that there was a video, we asked for video, we asked for anything that was pertinent, but we were never granted that opportunity." If Goodell had not seen the video, what was he basing his punishment for Rice’s actions off? And why would he had just seen the footage when the police had had it since Rice’s first arrest way back in February? Now according to the FBI, who decided to investigate this case, Goodell had seen the full footage of the tape and just under punished Rice. Rice is another example of a player who is very notable in fan popularity and likely many fans would come to see rice play. For this reason the league has done everything in their power, within legal terms, to keep him on the field. The NFL is a selfish society, in which is always looking for a way to profit themselves, and the best way for them to make profit is through the fans themselves. So if a particular player is who the fans want to see the commissioner wants that player out there.

Ray Rice and Ray McDonald both seem to be escaping true punishment from the league along with jail time, something that their average counterpart Rafael Dangond was unable to escape. If the parents of the children who watch football stopped to think about it, they would realize that domestic violence crimes committed by football players does not just involve the league and athletes themselves, but, their children as well could be affected by seeing what these football players are doing and getting away with and thinking it's okay.American football players are no different from regular people, and yet, the NFL allows them to get away with domestic violence because the NFL wants to use those players to make a profit.


Hanzus, Dan. "Ray McDonald Arrested on Domestic Violence Charges." Dan Hanzus, 31 Aug. 2014. Web. 22 Sept. 2014.

Barrows, Matt. "49ers’ Ray McDonald Arrested on Suspicion of Felony Domestic Abuse - The Sacramento Bee." The Sacramento Bee. Matt Barrows, 1 Sept. 2014. Web. 22 Sept. 2014.

Black, Clifton. "Employment Penalties of Domestic Violence." Colorado Criminal Law Guide. Clifton Black. Web. 22 Sept. 2014. <>.

Bien, Louis. "A Complete Timeline of the Ray Rice Assault Case." Louis Bien, 15 Sept. 2014. Web. 22 Sept. 2014.

Florio, Mike. "NFL Hires Independent Investigator in Ray Rice case."ProFootballTalk. Mike Florio, 10 Sept. 2014. Web. 22 Sept. 2014.

Crouch, Ian. "The N.F.L.'s New Domestic-Violence Rules." The New Yorker. IAN CROUCH, 28 Aug. 2014. Web. 22 Sept. 2014.

"Lissette Ochoa Domestic Violence Case." Wikipedia. Wikimedia Foundation, 13 Sept. 2014. Web. 22 Sept. 2014.


Ameer Holmes' 2fer Revision

More Shoe, More Human

Humans first used shoes as a simple tool, most likely to protect the wearer’s feet while still accommodating various terrains. Almost in an evolutionary sense, shoes grew along with people such like industry and clothing. In the first world culture, the shoe is the most important part of the outfit. This importance came from the psychological role shoes have played for people, being around for so long.

It is difficult to say man's absolute first reason for creating footwear, but not so difficult to infer. There are many people who chose not to wear shoes, one of which is a woman named Bea Marshal. Bea said she’d “stepped in glass and dog dirt”, bare footed. Though, not have doing significant damage to her it could have been worse. Due to humans being quadruped, feet have the overall most contact to the ground. Being that the ground has a plethora of things on it, feet would be susceptible to encountering most anything. Shoes are a useful yet simplistic way of keeping various bacteria, sharp objects and such away from any feet, as well as weathering effects like rain, snow and hot sand.

Shoe wearing has been a dedicated part of life and human nature for some time now. Even though some people choose not to wear shoes, those who deny them are making a big statement simply by doing so. The oldest shoes to date are typically sandals and such. These shoes then evolved into moccasins, and now into what people wear today. Each style of shoe came about in a different era of humanity. The shoe represents the culture and expression of people, as well as the environmental hardships they’ve been through. People have worn shoes for thousands of years; in fact the oldest shoe can be dated to 3500 b.c (National Geographic). Humans tend to be attached to things they’ve been with for a long time, personally and generationally. Take dogs for example. Dogs are known as man’s best friend for their long term coexistence with human beings as a pet or as family. The same can go for clothing, especially shoes. People tend to hold shoes the longest out of any article of clothing. People also tend to wear the same shoes with multiple outfits. Picking a pair of shoes is key and it represents who a person is.

In the first world, clothing industry style is key, and depending on the look someone’s going to get a specific shoe to match. The shoe is key because it is the most classic or erratic part of the outfit. It can also be a bland to neutral to tone the outfit down. Shoes aren’t just all about style however, they are also about comfort, appropriateness, and personal aid. A footwear company named Mtb has shoes to specifically prevent health problems, and to aid comfort. Avoiding harmful contact with the wearer’s feet is one thing, but shoes that can reduce the amount of bodily pain already held is a totally different ballpark. The Company claims to reduce pressure in specific areas while walking or standing. This decreases the amount of pressure exerted through a body, thus decreasing the amount of pains from such pressure. Being as though shoes do so much for people, there's no wonder why some might be so attached to them subconsciously.

Concludingly, there are phrases that suggest the importance of shoes are expressed all the time. Phrases along the lines of those shoes with that top, or being told not to step on Jordans are said eveveryday. That is the physiological importance shoes have in the outfit in a first world country. This is how the shoe came to represent human expression.

Works Cited:

Ravilious, Kate. "World's Oldest Leather Shoe Found-Stunningly Preserved." National Geographic. National Geographic Society, 09 June 2010. Web. 05 Oct. 2014.

Guy, Peter. "Painfreefeet | Foot Notes Blog." Foot Notes Is a Blog Commenting on Foot Health Issues Written by Peter Guy Chiropodist. Painfree.CA, 25 Apr. 2011. Web. 05 Oct. 2014.

Marshall, Bea. "Experience: I Don't Wear Shoes." Theguardian. Theguardian, 14 Feb. 2014. Web. 5 Oct. 2014.

1 Comment


No one likes being bored, this is the reason the entertainment industry makes so much money every year. Every week professional athletes put their bodies on the line to entertain the public. But the question is do sports fans value entertainment more than safety? Sports such as football, boxing, and bull riding are very physically demanding jobs, everyday people are seriously injured from doing these activities. People keep supporting the sports industry even though it is dangerous to the players just because it is entertaining.

In recent years, the NFL has been doing research to see the long term effect of football on its players. These studies are the result of former players now starting lawsuits against the NFL for hiding the long term consequences of the sport, even though they knew the risk. Neurologists have determined that football can lead to many brain diseases, a major one being CTE or Chronic Traumatic Encephalopathy. Some people who suffer from this have been known to have very short memories and others have even taken their own lives to try to cope with the pain the disease comes with. CTE includes symptoms such as memory loss, impaired judgement, anxiety, depression, and suicidality just to name a few. CTE also leads to Alzheimer's disease or worse ALS. Fans are very well aware of the consequences of playing professionally. This still does not stop them from encouraging huge hits and dangerous contact. Some players receive blows to the helmet and fans cheer for the collision. These same fans then turn to say that they would not allow their children to play the sport. Hall of fame quarterback Brett Farve said in an interview that even though he loves the sport is and glad he played, he would not allow his son to play a sport that violent. This shows that the safety of others is not important to them as long as they are entertained in the process. When injuries happen people even mock the player who has been injured, This is horrible and inhumane in every way possible.

The NFL is now involved in many lawsuits from former players for negligence and fraud because of head traumas found after their playing careers. An example of this is former NFL cornerback Paul Oliver. His repetitive head traumas led him to become moody, have memory loss, and anger issues. As a result of this, he shot himself in the head in front of his wife and children.His family and neurologist claim the suicide was a "direct result of the injuries, depression and emotional suffering caused by repetitive head trauma and concussions suffered as a result of playing football, not properly appreciating football's risks with respect to head trauma"   They say the NFL knew the long term risk of the sport but hid them.

Unlike football, the intent in boxing is to physically beat an opponent. The whole concept of the sport is violent. Fighters come into the match expecting to knock their opponent unconscious. Some doctors will call the process a severe concussion because of the similar trauma experienced. Muhammad Ali now suffers from Parkinson's disease because of the many blows taken to the head in his career. This has essentially left him paralyzed for the rest of his life.  The list of boxing injuries goes on and on.  The sport is so violent that some have even been brutally beaten to death in the ring. Spectators care in absolutely no way. They instead come up with sayings like if you cant take the beating stay out of the ring. Boxing has generated a lot of its money through bets placed by fans. This is something they can do to entertain themselves while the fighters spend months training for a fight. People then throw parties to watch the fight. The whole time they cheer for a certain fighter to knock the other out.

Unlike football and boxing bull riding does not have as many fans, but still has a reputable amount of fans. These fans come to rodeos to see if their favorite cowboy can stay on a bull for 8 seconds. The fans in this sport don’t necessarily cheer for violence but do support it in one way or another. Some fans cheer hoping their cowboys make it the 8 seconds to qualify and others stand hoping they fall off. When a rider falls off the bull, he is in more danger than most people will ever be in. Unlike a head to head collision in football or a strong uppercut in boxing, when hit by a 2,000 pound angry animal most people may not get up. Fans never want to see this happen but do support the idea of the sport. They love the thrill and anticipation of every ride knowing inside what could happen if those 8 seconds are not reached. Fans are entertained by the idea of not knowing what could happen in the run.

Many of the activities that are adorned by sports fans are very dangerous. Some like the sports for the competitive nature, and others just like the violence. Entertaining nowadays is not cheap. It has cost some people their lives, something that can never be repaid.
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Hola, Me llamo Aissatou Bah. Tengo 15 años. Soy de New York pero vivo en Filadelphia.

Soy bajo pero soy mucho guapa. Soy sociable et divertida. Soy timid un poco.

Me gusta comer sin embargo, me gusta ayudar en casa, cocinar et pasar un rato con amigas. No me gusta nada hablar por  teléfono et ir a la escuela.

¿Como te llamo?  ¿Que te gusta hacer?

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Remember to Move Your Mouth

“I’m gonna go to choir after school,” I said to my mom as she cooked dinner.

“Going. -e-ing,” my mom extended the sound.

“An I need you to sign my permission slip.”


“An I…”

“Let me hear you say the d first.”

“I don’t have time, I need to do my homework.”

“Say an-duh and then do your homework.”


My parents were born in a neighborhood in New Jersey where the lawns are perfectly cut, and the dialect is almost clear standard english. Ever since I said my first full sentence, my mom has corrected every mumbled or dropped consonant. While in younger grades, I thought the corrections were no different than ones from my teachers.

When I recently took a survey from the New York Times, the results showed that it is most likely that I live in New Jersey near Philadelphia based on the words I use and how I pronounce them. This accent comes from learning to speak from Jersey relatives and visiting my grandparents across the river, while living in Philadelphia..

“I want to axe you something,” I announced as I walked into the kitchen on a different day.

“You’re doing it again,” my mom said.

“What? All I said was I want to axe you a question.”

“You are talking like a Philadelphian.”

The first few times I heard this, my heart sank.

“What do you mean?”

“The word is as-kah, not axe.”

“I said [pause] ask.”

“No, you said axe.”

This discussion repeated throughout the first years of my life. The words echoed in my head, even when my mom was not around. I began to repeat myself, pausing mid sentence. This time coincided with my acceptance into a mentally gifted elective.

“Can someone tell me what [science term] is,” my fifth grade teacher would ask.

“[short answer]. I once saw on Nova [extra details].”

“That is fascinating, Miriam, although I was only looking for [expected answer].”

My fifth grade teacher encouraged my input, working the outside knowledge I connected to the lesson into the discussion.

“Haven’t you seen that episode before,” my Dad asked.

“Of course. I even know the words by heart.” I was currently sitting on the couch, watching a tv show.

“Why watch it then?”

“To refresh my memory. Besides, there is nothing else on.”

I would watch cartoons daily when I was younger. I learned to multiply from Cyberchase and vocabulary words from Martha Speaks and Word Girl. The contests on Fetch caught my imagination, and I loved the storytelling on Arthur. While watching repeats, I would draw the characters and say their lines with them.

“Who can work through the first part of this problem,” a math teacher would ask.

I was the only one to raise my hand, even though I knew my whole table had completed the class work. The teacher scanned the room as if no one had their hand raised.

“Nick, can you tell me what I should do first,” the teacher looked straight at him.

“I don’t know.” Nick glanced at the work on his paper, and then stared at the teacher again.

“Come on, it’s easy.”

“Subtract x from both sides?”


I understood that my teachers wanted to encourage all the students to speak, but there were entire weeks where I was not called on in middle school. Teachers only gave me help upon request, knowing I got all As and Bs.

“Miriam, sing louder,” my music teacher said at choir practice.

“I don’t know if I can.”

“Don’t you yell in the recess yard?”

“Not really.”

I became quiet, yet not unsociable. My friends often spoke softer than me, afraid a teacher would not seat us together if we talked loudly, even though my friends and I only talked about work in class. Collaboration was not valued in my middle school. In some classes, I was quiet, and in others, people thought I was shy.

“Can anyone describe what global warming is,” my engineering teacher asked. He scanned the room for a raised hand. “Miriam.”

“Global warming is caused by greenhouse gases in the atmosphere. Greenhouse gasses, such as carbon dioxide, trap heat from the sun when the heat bounces off Earth’s surface,” I answered.

During the first few days of my freshman engineering class, most of the students were quiet. Every time our teacher asked a question, only two or three people raised their hand, and I was one of them. For some reason, the teacher told me after class that I should not be shy because I know so much.

At that point in my life, I did not consider myself shy. My classmates and I were all quietly adjusting to a new school. If anything, I was talking more than I had in years. However, every once in a while, the high pitched soprano would appear in my voice, and I would pause to clear my throat. Some interpreted this as shyness. Every time someone said I should talk more, I promised myself I would. The more often this occured, the less confident I felt. This continued to occur in poetry club.

“It was bedar to wear a masq than let mounans of acne show.”

“Say it again slowly.”

“It was be-agh. It was better to wear a masq-agh.”

“We can’t have you saying agh on stage.”

“I know Mr. Kay. I am having trouble with mumbling.”

“Try tasting each syllable of your poem. Say the line again as slow as you can.”

“Maybe we should write it on the board. What was the line,” Chella, who was one of the coaches, asked.

“ wear...a mask...than let...mountains...of acne….show,” I said slowly.

“I heard mountains! Chella, did you hear mountains,” Mr. Kay asked.

“I thought it was mounds,” Chella answered.

“It is mountains,” I said.

“Try saying it again.”

“It was bedar to wear…”

“Bet-ter. Say the t.”

“It was better to wear a mask…”

“Remember to move your mouth. It was better to wear a mask than let mountains of acne show.”

“It was better to wear a mask than let mountains of acne show.”

“Great. Now, say the whole poem at that pace.”

James Baldwin once wrote “It goes without saying, then, that language is also a political instrument, means, and proof of power.”  When I stumbled over my words, people hesitated to absorb my points. The correct pronunciation would echo in my mind while my tongue was weak. My mom always corrected me, thinking it was a Philadelphian accent. I would pause to correct myself, which led people to believe I was shy or lacked confidence. Confidence is a form of power. I did not stop mumbling until the time Mr. Kay helped me say my poem clearly. If I had mumbled through my poem, it would not have grabbed people’s attention.

I taught my tongue to say every consonant and vowel in that poem. I performed without a single stutter, allowing my team to receive a high enough score, and win the slam. Doubting my ability to speak properly made me believe I was shy. This was my weakness. When I was little, I would lose my breathe mid sentence. Singing in choir taught me to breathe. Reciting poetry trained my mouth to speak clearly.


Bella Mezzaroba's 2fer Revision

Even though an 18 year old is considered an adult,the national legal drinking age in the United States is 21,  Even with this age restriction in place, so many get caught under the influence at younger ages. Keeping in mind that the United States is the only developed country with a legal drinking age of 21, the rest being around 18, the U.S. is behind in the times. The United States should lower their drinking age to 18 and the U.S. needs to catch up with the rest of the world’s developed countries.

The United States is inarguably conservative with their Minimum Legal Drinking Age (MLDA). Only 4% of the world’s countries set their legal age at 21 and, out of this 4%, the U.S. is the only fully developed country. 71% of countries have a legal drinking age of between 16-19, averaged at about 18. They’re MLDA, which was established in 1984, is outdated even though it was established long after countries like the U.K. established their drinking age. The United Kingdom passed the Intoxicating Liquor act in 1923, which restricted liquor sales to individuals over 18. This MLDA has worked well for them for 91 years so what’s to say it wouldn’t work for the United States.

The CDC states that 126,438 accidental deaths occurred in the U.S. during 2010 and of that about 88,000 were attributed to alcohol, coming out to about 69%. In the United Kingdom, 17,201 accidental deaths were recorded in 2010 with 8,367 of these deaths being from alcohol, a total of 48%. A country with a lower MLDA also has a lower alcohol related death rate. A lower drinking age does have an impact on the statistical, alcohol related deaths but it’s a positive one. People tend to want to do what they can’t so when an American 18 year old is offered beer at a party, they’ll drink as much as they can since this isn’t an opportunity that arises daily. If a British 18 year old was offered a beer, they’d most likely accept, but it wouldn’t be such a huge deal since they can go to the store and pick up a six pack whenever they please. If teens were educated properly and given the responsibility of drinking, then the U.S.’s alcohol related deaths would decrease.

Drinking is a matter of responsibility. One needs to be considered mature enough to handle the intoxication with class and not harm anyone in the process. However, it’s questionable about what age that maturity begins. The age to join the military has been set at 18 since 1942. There are soldiers who are considered mature enough for an AK-47 but not a beer. The logic in that is incredibly skewed. The United States trust these men and women with the lives of their comrades and civilians but can’t trust them with their own lives. If a citizen is old enough to enlist than they should be old enough to consume alcohol. Not only can a 21 year old enlist, they can apply for a credit card, serve on a jury, sign a binding contract, marry without parental consent, vote, and be charged as an adult in a court of law. A 18 year old is no longer a minor and is considered a full fledged adult in all aspects except one. Clearly, 18 year olds are considered mature enough for mostly everything so drawing the line at alcohol consumption is arbitrary.

Alcohol can be dangerous if not used responsibly, that much is clear. About 88,000 deaths are caused annually by alcohol. Only 5,000 of these were caused by underage drinking. According to Choose Responsibility, an organization in favor of lowering the MLDA,  the number of underage deaths has been going down since 1970, 14 years before the MLDA act was passed. Therefore, no correlation can be drawn between the two and the act is not responsible for decline in alcohol fatalities amongst underage people. Choose Responsibility says,"... twice as many 21-year-olds died in alcohol-related auto accidents as 18 year-olds. Such a staggering statistic speaks volumes: a policy that claims to be saving thousands each year may simply be re-distributing deaths over the life cycle to the point at which it becomes legal to drink alcohol..." If the MLDA in it’s current state is simply postponing drunk driving accidents until drinking becomes legal, then it seems the problem isn’t young people drinking, it’s how the youth is being educated on the dangers of alcohol. If educated properly, an 18 year old would be much more responsible than an uninformed 21 year old.

Although the legal drinking age may only seem important  to those between the ages of 18 and 21, it should in fact concern anyone who cares about cultivating a community of young people who act responsibly. When those who previously were not trusted with the privilege of drinking are entrusted with alcohol consumption, accidental deaths will decrease. Drunk driving accidents and things of that sort affect us all, as should the legal drinking age.Not only is a lower MLDA in direct correlation with lessening alcohol related deaths, it’s logical to trust those we deem adults with something like alcohol. The United States should lower their legal drinking age to 18 as it is medically,politically, and most importantly, rationally sound.

Am I choosing my ¨language¨ or is my environment doing that for me?

¨LJ we are leaving soon for the airport now.  Your plane leaves in two and a half hours.¨ My Mom yells.

I finish packing my bag and head downstairs.

¨I am going to miss you while you're gone.¨

¨Mom, you don’t have to worry ‘bout nothing.  I’m call you when I get on the plane and when I get off.

She smiles.

I am heading to Arizona.  I signed up for an advance hitting and fielding camp at Arizona State University.  Arizona State is one of the top baseball schools in the country.  If I could impress them in a two day camp, it could help me get recruited to play for them in college.  While I am there I am going to stay with my Aunt Jenn and her husband and 4 children.  They are on my Mom’s side of the family.  After the camp was over I would get on a plane to Boston, to spend time with my dad and his side of the family.  We leave for the airport 10 minutes later.  As we get to the airport me and my Mom say our final goodbyes.

¨Call me as soon as you can.  You hear me?¨

¨Yes Mom, as soon as I board the plane and land, call you.¨

¨See you in August.¨

My Mom hugs me.  I get to the gate.  It is my first time traveling by myself.  I get scared.  I realized that this will help me in the long run.  I quickly get over my fear.  Next thing I know I am on the plane taking off, heading west.

It is important for me to say that my Mom is adopted.  She was adopted into a white family in the early 1970’s.  This means all of her family is white.  When I am with them there is a different language I use.  This happens by accident.  I grew up in a liberal, urban scene, while my family is more conservative and lives either in a suburban area or out in the country.  When I am with my Mom and sister, the urban part of me talks. The ¨Black English¨ like James Baldwin once said.  When I am with my Grandma or Aunt, I start to talk more proper.  This happens by accident.  Since I am not of the same race, I try to make language as a way to be the same as them, since in my eyes we are not.  We speak the same language, but it is so different at the same time.

¨Welcome to Phoenix Sky Harbor International Airport.  We know you have a lot of options when flying, but US Airways would like to thank you for choosing us.  We hope we will see you soon.¨  The flight attendant said on the loudspeaker of the plane.  I call my Mom.

¨Yeah Mom, I’m ‘bout get off this plane.¨

¨How was the flight?¨

¨It was ard.¨

¨Ok, well call me when you find your Uncle Drew.  He got a new car, so make sure it is him before you get into the car.¨

¨Ok, I will call you when I see him.¨

I get my bags and walk out of the plane.  I put on my headphones.  Jay-Z is playing in my ears.  

¨I probably owe it to you all, proud to be locked by the force, Trying to hustle some things, that go with the Porsche.¨

I see my Uncle Drew in his new car.  He helps puts my bags in the trunk.  I get into the car and I hear a Christian gospel song.  

¨I’m so grateful for all you have done in my life.  I give my life to you.¨

I turn my music off really quick.  My uncle gets in the car and we have small talk.

¨It’s great to see you buddy, how was your flight over here?¨ He said with a smile on his face.

¨It was great, Uncle Drew.  There were no problems at all on the plane ride here.¨

¨You ready for the baseball camp on Saturday?¨

¨Yeah I really can’t wait, I have been waiting the whole summer for this moment and now it is here.

¨Well your cousins are up and waiting for you at the house.¨

We get to the house and all four of my cousins are happy to see me.  My youngest cousin, Quincy takes me to see all of her new Legos.

¨See this one.  It’s really pretty.  This is my favorite Lego because it’s pink.¨ Quincy said with a smile on her face.

¨Yeah you're right it is very pretty, my favorite part is that it is pink.¨ I said back to her.

We look and play with Legos for a couple of minutes, then it is time for her to go to bed.  I decide that I should go to bed too.  The camp doesn’t start tomorrow but I should get some rest anyway.   I text my mom and tell her that I got in safely and that I would talk to her in the morning.

On Sunday, the camp ended.  When I talked to the coaches after it ended, they said I did good and they hope to see me again.  I get in the car.  My friend texted me.

¨How did the camp go?¨

¨I fried at the man bro.  Coaches said I did good.  They hope to see me again.¨

¨Ayye I see you bro. You going to go to another camp?¨

¨Idk, maybe they have a camp in September, but that is even more money and school has started.

¨Ard I will ttyl.¨


My Uncle asked me the same question.

¨It was really good.  The coaches helped me a lot, especially when it came to hitting.  I’m glad that I came out here for the camp.¨

We head back home and I pack up.  I am heading to Boston for the rest of the summer.  I get my bags and I get back into the car.  My cousin Aiden and Holden tag along for the ride to the airport.  We talk about school and sports.  As we get to the airport we say our goodbyes.  I head to the gate.  I like spending time with my family, even if I think I have to change a little for them.

James Baldwin once said ¨A Frenchman living in Paris speaks a subtly and crucially different language from that of the man living in Marseilles; neither sounds very much like a man living in Quebec; and they would all have great difficulty in apprehending what the man from Guadeloupe, or Martinique, is saying, to say nothing of the man from Senegal.¨  What he is saying is that all of these people speak the same language but all of them speaks it a different way because of their background.  I agree with that.  My family and I speak the same language, but since we are from different parts of the country and from different backgrounds, it is a little different.  Even if the language we speak is a little different, we are family and at the end of the day that is all that matters.
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2fer revision

The Hunger Games trilogy focuses on a teenage girl named Katniss who, after losing her father in a mining accident, was left to support herself, mother and little sister. At a very young age she became the caretaker and provider for her family when her mother shut down after her fathers death. Similarly, many children and teenagers in America have a pre-selected fate because of the economic classes they are born into. The fictional Hunger Game series portrays how different economic classes in America cause specific classes to achieve less because of the low access they’re given for the same opportunities.

In the Hunger Games, everyone lives in a dystopian America now known as Panem. The country is separated into 12 districts and the Capital, but used to have a 13th before they were “killed” off. The Capital holds the richest of the rich, and as the districts increase in their number, the poorer those citizens are. Every year the country hosts the hunger games, where a boy and a girl from each district, ranging anywhere from 12-18, are chosen from a random draw to fight to the death in an arena, giving the winners district extra food. The poorer districts have a disadvantage, as one can offer to have their name enter more and more in exchange for more food for your family. Their names are then entered more and more, while the children from the richer districts have the minimum number of entries and have been trained to win the Games since childhood. Katniss is a resident of district 12, one of the poorest districts. Unable to move, she is stuck in a cycle fighting for daily survival, until she volunteers for the Hunger games to save her sister and the real games begin.

In America, people of higher economic classes are preselected to “win” at life by being born with advantages lower economic classes do not have. American families are continuing to struggle with their wages and stability, while the rich are getting richer. In a paper published on the Center for American Progress’s website, analysing what the new census data shows about the struggling middle class, research associates state; “Household incomes remained essentially flat in 2013—far below their pre-recession levels—and the share of the national economic pie that goes to the middle class continued to stagnate close to record lows. At the same time, those at the very top claimed the majority of the income growth seen since the recession’s end.” (Miller, Madland) Middle class families in America are experiencing some of the same struggles Katniss had to face in The Hunger Games. These children in middle class families are continuing to fall below the poverty line, affecting their opportunities in life. They are less likely to have access to materials that increase their chances in life, such as education, as those above the poverty line. Real children in America are already segregated by their economic class whether they realize it or not. People generally living in the Kensington area of North Philadelphia, Pennsylvania don’t have the same income as those who live in Gerald Estates of South Philadelphia. Lower income families are separated into neighborhoods with other people of their class, just like the districts in the Hunger Games.

The Hunger Games and America have many similarities, despite the “sci-fi” labeling. Katniss may not have been homeless, but if she did not step up and assume the responsibility as the head of the house, she would have ended up hungry and cold like the other children and elders she encountered on her streets. The effects of poverty are shown throughout the Hunger Games, but it can be seen all around America. According to the American Psychological Association, APA, the effects of poverty in America match many things seen in the poverty stricken districts.  “Deepening poverty is inextricably linked with rising levels of homelessness and food insecurity/hunger for many Americans and children are particularly affected by these conditions...Children and teens living in poorer communities are at increased risk for a wide range of physical health problems...Exposure to violence in their communities which can lead to trauma, injury, disability, and mortality”(APA) The mental illness and death that poverty leads to is seen in different regions of America, just as Katniss seen walking around District 12. The people of District 12 were mostly of the same economic class, just as many cities and neighborhoods in America are. The people of higher economic classes, mainly from district 1-4, were very judgemental towards the poor. They were disgusted with the unfortunate, and were very enthusiastic about the games. They knew the chances of anyone from district 5 or higher winning were slim, and the impoverished would dwindle.  

Many people view the Hunger Games trilogy as pure fiction. They don’t bother to see that side of America, but it is here. Real Americans are being judged by their economic struggles and its never ending cycle. Parents generally want better for their children, but how can they give them that when they have pre-selected disabilities based on their income? The hunger games helped bring real poverty into light, and how people of different economic classes truly react based on their preselected fates.

Works Cited:

"Effects of Poverty, Hunger, and Homelessness on Children and Youth."Http:// N.p., n.d. Web. 20 Sept. 2014.

Miller, Keith, and David Madland. "What the New Census Data Show About the Continuing Struggles of the Middle Class." Name. Center for American Progress, 16 Sept. 2014. Web. 20 Sept. 2014.

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The Most Important Thing in the World

“Kara, say water.”

“Wooder,” I said.

“No, say it right. Like this. Wah-ter.”


“You say it weird.”

I hear that a lot. I am a Philadelphian. I don’t say water, I say wooder. I don’t say towel, I say tal. I don’t say aunt, I say ant. This has been something that stood out about my language. Ofcourse, not at home, not in this city, but everywhere else, I stand out because of the words I say and how I say them.

My family and I do a great deal of traveling, mostly in this country. We’ve been to Maine, Virginia, Nevada, Tennessee, North Carolina, Florida, and most of the local states, New Jersey, Delaware, Maryland, New York, Vermont, and Rhode Island. Nothing really stood out about us but the way we spoke.

Most people in all of those states didn’t notice. The state that really noticed our way of speaking the most was probably Tennessee. In a particular place in Tennessee, Dollywood, a waitress there liked to separate the Northern people from the Southern.

“I like the way ya’ll speak,” she said, “and ya tip good.”

I was young at the time, about six.  I didn’t know I was different. To me, she was the one that spoke different. I thought I spoke “normal.” But what really is the “normal” way of speaking?

Everyone in Philadelphia is different, we speak mostly the same way, but some have different words or ways of saying things. Instead of you guys, some say yous. I don’t use this, nor do I ever say jawn, a made up word only known here. But I admit I do say “yo” a lot.

I know that some words I pronounce different, even from people in Philly. For example, the name of my eighth grade teacher, Mr. Rossi.

“Mr. Raw-si. That’s how Kara says it,” I overheard my friend Diana say.

“So? Isn’t that the way everyone says it?” I asked, confused.

“No. You sound British! It’s supposed to be Mr. Rahsi!” she said, laughing.

That annoyed me. If it’s “Rahsi” then why is it spelled with an O?!

After that, I classified my way of speaking as different. People constantly pointed out how weird I said things. I didn’t really care much, it wasn’t a big deal, it was a little annoying, but in reality everyone has a different vocabulary and language and you can’t classify anyone’s as weird, because there is no standard language or way of speaking in my opinion. Now, I would like to go back and tell every person that judged the way I spoke just that.

“It is the most vivid and crucial key to identify: it reveals the private identity, and connects one with, or divorces one from, the larger, public, or communal identity.” - James Baldwin

Language is what makes you. James Baldwin says it reveals your identity and is the most important part of it. You can tell who a person is by their language. It is what individualizes us in a society. It can connect you to a group or exclude you.

Here’s a scenario. You have a group of friends. You and the rest of a group of people speak Spanish, you fit right in. But there are many different Spanish dialects, and you happen to be the only different one. You feel weird or left out, but really you should feel unique and amazed at how amazing language is and how you stand out.

I, with my Philadelphian accent, don’t feel like I stand out. I feel slightly different, yes, but not excluded from society. I’ve never really gotten bullied, people just said things. My language does reveal who I am. When I can’t think of a word for a certain thing, I say thingy. This reveals my bad memory. I’ve gotten into the habit of saying “kk” instead of ok, this reveals my vulnerability to internet slang.  I added the word “ain’t” into my vocabulary in the second grade, which really ticked my family off, “it’s not in the dictionary!” I inherited the word from friends, which shows how easily my vocabulary can be expanded from others’ vocabulary.

“I’m done.” My friend Darius says a lot after seeing something funny.

“That’s crazy!” My friend Kat says in a high pitched voice after seeing something slightly shocking to her.

And now, when I see something funny I say “I’m done.” When I see something shocking, I say “that’s crazy!” It’s funny how my language and vocabulary can be easily influenced by friends, that I’m around them so much that I talk like them. This happens to mostly everyone. This is how people develop their language. By using others’, but making that into their own.

I don’t remember learning how to speak, gaining all the words I know now, and learning what most of them mean. It’s weird thinking about how big my vocabulary is, and how I got all these words and lessons along the way in my life. In third grade, I won a lot of spelling bees and my highest grade was always English. Grammar and spelling were always my strong areas. I felt happy and proud of myself for being good at it. I’m glad I still have this skill now, for writing.  

As you can see, language is something that I've used throughout my whole entire life, but never really thought upon till now, with this project. I realize the importance of it, how it connects us all as a society, how we get to know each other, and how we identify ourselves. Language is really the most important thing in the world.

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